just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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