is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize