how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
