Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
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