i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
