i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
my liver is dry heaving
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize
