Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
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This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
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I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst