I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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