You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I can tuck mytits in my pants
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Randomize
