I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.