when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
