Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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