remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
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