South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize