What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Multitasking record: pooping whilst putting on shoes and cleaning ear with q-tip. All while texting.
Update: fell off toilet, one shoe on, q-tip still in ear. Not a pro.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
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