But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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