Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
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