What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
he laminated a picture of his dick.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
