He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Randomize
