sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
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