You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
I cut my penus on the lid.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
