She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Randomize
