Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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