yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
you would pick up someone in the library
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
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