'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
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