your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
