Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
This is the prime rib incident all over again
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
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