You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
Blood and glitter go together right?
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
21 Awkward Ways People Found Out Their Partner Was Into Outrageous Sex Acts
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus