I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
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