This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
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