i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Randomize
