I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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