with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Randomize
