You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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