She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Randomize
