no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
one might say we're banned from that church
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
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