I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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