so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Randomize
