Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Randomize