What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
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