My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
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