She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
