Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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