i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
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