She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Randomize
