There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
