I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
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