Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Is it penis luge time yet?
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
Randomize
