Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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