somebody snuck up and got me drunk
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
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The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
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Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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