HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Randomize