Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
they're like a gay fantastic four
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
